tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35619589.post4887002801158428133..comments2023-10-20T09:04:45.829+01:00Comments on My New Notebook: The weaker sex?Cathyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14103529618681254875noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35619589.post-75440585244932832602007-08-20T16:09:00.000+01:002007-08-20T16:09:00.000+01:00Thanks for your comments, Anne and Sue.Crystal, I ...Thanks for your comments, Anne and Sue.<BR/><BR/>Crystal, I think it does depend on the individual, but some parents do find it hard to accept a nonverbal child with challenging behaviour. We largely take it in our stride...and I have to say Hubby is even better at that than I am...but I can see why some people don't/can't.<BR/><BR/>CxCathyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14103529618681254875noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35619589.post-47373166467858582752007-08-20T15:02:00.000+01:002007-08-20T15:02:00.000+01:00A very interesting post. I have a slightly differ...A very interesting post. I have a slightly different situation of which I will blog about in due course but grief was never a part of our acceptance to Amy's autism. She is "normal" in our eyes. If other people do not want to perceive her as such I consider it to be their problem. <BR/><BR/>I think men and women deal with such things in their own ways. Neither is right or wrong. It is very sad to hear about your friends and I wish them all the best in their recovery. <BR/><BR/>Crystal xxAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35619589.post-38436155507335327582007-08-19T12:11:00.000+01:002007-08-19T12:11:00.000+01:00John, your contributions to any debate are always ...John, your contributions to any debate are always so interesting. Thanks!<BR/><BR/>I'm with you on the sharing of domestic tasks etc being a matter of nurture...upbringing, culture etc. But I do think that the inability of many men to open up and share is also partly genetic...and I say that as we are watching our son grow into almost a clone of an uncle he rarely sees ( psychologically as much as physically). There has to be a genetic influence there somewhere.Cathyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14103529618681254875noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35619589.post-13145343247357066092007-08-19T11:25:00.000+01:002007-08-19T11:25:00.000+01:00Having brought up 3 sons and a daughter; then, in ...Having brought up 3 sons and a daughter; then, in turn, I was educated by 3 granddaughters (23, 19, 16)!! I can find no clear pattern that places any of them neatly into gender roles.<BR/><BR/>I think when Pat and I married (the two rebels ... it would never last) we had no role models, and therefore invented married life.<BR/><BR/>We placed family at the centre of everything; the key role was the 'Family Manager' - the support role was the earner. It happened that I fitted the latter role, and gave uo the job I loved -building boats - because it would not support the family in the way we had planned, to fly aeroplanes for 24 years.<BR/><BR/>We have no 'his' or 'hers', 'ours' or 'theirs'; even now if one of the family itches, we all scratch! We share all domestic tasks!<BR/><BR/>The point I am trying to make, is I think very little of the gender role is 'nature', most of it is nurture.<BR/><BR/>This is obviously a very narrow viewpoint to bring to the debate, but I thought I would offer it.Gatepost productionshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18061920423331681586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35619589.post-81592375993007084272007-08-19T01:02:00.000+01:002007-08-19T01:02:00.000+01:00So sorry to read your post tonight, it's very sad....So sorry to read your post tonight, it's very sad. <BR/><BR/>I think with men it's part of their mechanics. They don't like to talk and as you say just bottle it up.<BR/><BR/>I know support is hard in this situation for families anyway but are there support groups available for men only?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35619589.post-44233947415295326052007-08-17T21:52:00.000+01:002007-08-17T21:52:00.000+01:00So sorry to hear this, Cathy - sending good though...So sorry to hear this, Cathy - sending good thoughts to the family in questions. And hugs to yourself of course<BR/><BR/>A<BR/>xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxAnne Brookehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03982495677389302410noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35619589.post-14996731069212395942007-08-17T20:29:00.000+01:002007-08-17T20:29:00.000+01:00Thank you, John! Yes the mother/son relationship c...Thank you, John! Yes the mother/son relationship can be complicated ( you should have heard my mum on the subject of her mother-in-law!)<BR/><BR/>But, as the mother of a troubled teenager, I can testify to the fact boys do tend to bottle things up. I'm not sure how much of that is them trying to conform to society's expectations and how much is genetic.<BR/><BR/>Interestingly, both boys and girls who are brought up with a disabled sibling seem to often develop a high level of empathy and it is not unusual for them to go into caring professions, when you might expect them to shy away from it all in adulthood.Cathyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14103529618681254875noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35619589.post-52961623459327283542007-08-17T20:03:00.000+01:002007-08-17T20:03:00.000+01:00It is an interesting statistic that 1 in every 11 ...It is an interesting statistic that 1 in every 11 people is a carer; of these the majority are women.<BR/><BR/>Society does seem to shape roles for men and women, and in this process mothers certainly play a key role in the development of their sons; and are therefore not blameless.<BR/><BR/>Nevertheless, I feel modern man steps back from domestic responcibility, fails to place the needy before himself, and is generally self-centred.<BR/><BR/>A really interesting piece of writing Cathy.<BR/><BR/>John SimlettGatepost productionshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18061920423331681586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35619589.post-47294112201185467322007-08-17T18:21:00.000+01:002007-08-17T18:21:00.000+01:00Thanks for your interesting comment, ks. I've not ...Thanks for your interesting comment, ks. I've not heard of Jackson Katz so will have to go and take a look!Cathyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14103529618681254875noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35619589.post-87672382812080579622007-08-17T16:13:00.000+01:002007-08-17T16:13:00.000+01:00My heart goes out to your friends and their famili...My heart goes out to your friends and their families.<BR/><BR/>Through the ups and downs of developing intimate relationships with men, I, myself, have had similar thoughts about men and their coping skills. In comparison to many of the young women I know, men of the same age category seem to "deal" less effectively with many areas of life.<BR/><BR/>I tend to lean towards the theory that these gender variations stem from the different ways our culture socializes boys and girls. An inspiring lecturer who I remember from my university days is <A HREF="http://www.jacksonkatz.com/" REL="nofollow"> Jackson Katz</A>. Ironically, he was mentioned in this months Elle magazine, which resurrected him from my memory.<BR/><BR/>Anyway, thanks for the thought provoking post!Natalie Devoehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05105719399509546293noreply@blogger.com